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Saturday, June 27, 2009
Weird, Dreams
Weird, Dreams..Reading about Jing's weird dream, make me remember of mine too.. I've dreamt, a lot.. Those weird, very weird ones.. Like, Vampire.. Ghost, and dead.. Maybe, those are just my own thoughts.. Who knows, god knows?? I recall the latest weird dream, very weird.. I dream of my cousin, and my friend.. But, weirdly.. The dream seem so REAL, but I knew they're not.. The content of the dream is blur, so I won't talk much.. Dream, reflect on own thoughts.. Dream, are always opposite of reality.. How sweet, how wonderful.. They're, all dreams.. Foolish, dumb.. I always wishes, I could stay inside the dream forever.. I realize, I couldn't take much, stress.. Everyone doesn't too, but who likes it?? No-one, no-one.. I should, not dawn too much on past.. Look forward on the future, and go for it.. =) Monday, June 22, 2009
Thinking, Back..
Thinking, Back..Those times, last time.. Happy moments, happy smile.. They're, all past.. Memories, to be kept.. I can't go back, to the past.. Living with regrets, which maybe everyone does at times.. Maybe, that's just life.. To live, and struggle.. To learn, to smile.. To hide, the tears.. To forget, the hurts.. To remember, the happy.. Whatever it is, it's just life.. Fated, and seal.. Everyday, is just a new challenge.. To me, or to anyone.. Learning new stuff, and to see the world.. I realize, how little can a person get.. Sitting in the train, traveling alone.. Watching the crowd, come and go.. Ignoring each other, like it's air.. That's just, everyday life.. Confident, is leaving me at a slow rate.. Loneliness, start to corrupt my mind.. I may seem happy, outside.. But, how happy can I stay inside?? I'm not faking, it's just how life goes on.. People, come and goes.. Leaving behind, memories.. I tried hard learn, I tried hard to get used to the surrounding.. I tried, I really tired.. But I realize, the truth.. The real me, the very real side of me.. I'm afraid of lonely, I'm afraid of losing.. I'm afraid of everything, everywhere.. I just like to, run away.. Run away, from reality.. Run away, from the truth.. Run away, from those thinking.. But, I can't help it.. I'm just that weak, inside and outside.. I smile, just because I don't wish anyone to worry.. But, how much my smile goes.. My tears are just there, filing up my eyes.. I'm blind, with my own stupid minds.. I believe, the most stupid stuff.. I dream, the most unrealistic things.. Stubborn, is always surrounding me.. Which stops me, to go forward.. To close my heart, to close my mind.. Who am I, I guess that's for me to find out myself.. In the meantime, I will try hard to figure out.. My life, and my minds.. I'm fine, don't worry about me.. It's just, a process.. Everyone goes through, so am I now.. I just need to learn, to take it as it comes.. So, that's all for my crappy mind now.. Bye, and god bless.. May everyone stay happy, and smile always.. =) Monday, June 15, 2009
Heaty, Nosebleed
Recently, the weather was sooooo HOT!!Maybe, due to that kind of HOT weather.. My nose start bleeding again, my god.. Or, maybe it's thoe heaty food I eat.. Durian was one of them, I eat last sunday.. I should stop eating heaty food, if not later the bleeding comes again.. Headace, headace.. Talking about food, reminds me.. I've being eating Subway quite often recently, YUMMY.. Thanks to my mum, who's kinda of addicated eating Subway.. She love the Tuna, I don't know why.. I don't hate Tuna, but neither do I love it.. But, well.. It's ok anyway, Subway is healthy.. I'm trying to cut down my weight, which my mum said there's n much cange (how great.. =.=!!) My mum's friend comment I've slim a little, some friend said too.. I hope so, and maybe wanted to really slim down more.. Maybe it's because, sign of health problem had being showing up recently.. I hope it's not too late, i hope.. Let's pray, I could stay healthy and happy like usual.. =) Tuesday, June 09, 2009
210
Can't help, not to think..Time changes, so much.. Bad, or good.. It's changing, every single second.. We grow up, every day.. Gaining things, and losing some.. What is lost, is gone forever.. No matter how hard, It can't go back.. Being straight-forward, always lands me into regrets.. Regret speaking without thinking, regret making everyone dirft off me.. No amout of action or words, can make it up.. I screw it up, all myself.. Next time, I should stop myself for making more regret.. Be it, friends.. Or, anything.. I just, wanted.. To be, just me.. Simple, and ME!! Who am I, I am who?? I wonder, I thinks.. I am who I am, It's logic.. I am just myself, MYSELF.. Ok, I should stop ranting.. Some idotic brother is up, so I should goes off soon.. Thursday, June 04, 2009
Back, Back!!
Back, Back!!Anyone miss me, I bet NO.. =.=!! Finally, after nearly 1 month of MIA-ING (Ok, not 1 month, just only 2 week +) I'm, FINALLY BACK!! Got an old computer, kindly donated by my cousin.. Bye Bye to that lagging Laptop, Bye!! Will miss that, as the keypad are more easy to type compare to the one now.. Recently, not really any exciting stuff happen.. But, My brother will be back home soon.. Meaning, someone will snatch computer with me.. No, I don't want!! But, Well.. I kind of miss him, the house seem so quiet after he went overseas.. Maybe, it's just me whom goes all quiet down.. I felt I'm going to be mute, soon.. Maybe, I'm just so trap in my own thoughts.. Couldn't walk out, of those fears.. Worried, afraid.. I know, myself.. I can't be myself, the myself I hated.. I hate, maybe because I fear.. I fear, being alone.. But, I'm always alone.. I tried, to smile happily.. But, I felt the smile weight too much.. I fear, I'm getting lost.. But, I'm always so lost.. So, what's the real fear?? I don't know, I don't want to know.. Maybe, some people will think I think too much.. I hope, I wish that I think too much.. Maybe, being over sensitive lead me to be that.. One little action, affect ever part of me.. One single words, crash the mood.. So, I jolly well know that.. I should shut my mouth, to avoid more un-happiness.. Being too frank and straightforward, lead to a tiring me.. I learn, and I know.. I should, keep all to myself.. That will be, better I guess?? Meeting you, is fate.. Driving apart, is me.. I felt, I'm walking alone.. In a dark path, without any light or exit.. Those dreams, scary.. It's just because, I fear.. Maybe, somewhere.. I just wish, to be understood.. Somehow!! |
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